It seems like I never have the right “inspirational” post to
upload – I have had posts upon posts, written half way but never got to
complete them because it was either I got stuck or I did not feel like I had the
right words to say – “I am not sure if this post would make sense to anyone, I am
not sure I would be helping as many people as I want to. I am not sure it would
ever get read, I'm just not feeling it!” So because of that uncertainty, that “fear”
of not meeting up to the expectations of what i think people want, I have not posted in over 2
months! Your mind and fears have a way of stopping you from reaching your
potential. If you are anything like me, then you can analyse from now till thy
kingdom come. You can see all the imperfections in a situation and possibly kill
that thing before it even gets a chance at getting better.
I have been in this headspace for a while – Recovering from
past experiences that bent me in such a way that I would rather point out a
fault even in myself, thinking that it would not hurt when someone else mentions
it! How wrong was I, it didn’t make it any better. I only caved back in and
started running away from who I knew I was into someone that I could not
recognize. Oh yes I prayed, sought after Him hoping that I would in return find
myself again. Then I realised that the Word can only take root if I truly let
go of my fears, insecurities and pain. I desperately wanted to start walking in
the shoes He made especially for me.
"Until you start walking in purpose, you
can never truly know complete happiness".
So I started the battle with self – My mind, my body, my
heart and my soul! I had to just let go – If you have been “through”, if you
have been hurt, neglected, ridiculed, insulted and you think you want to go far
in life with all those baggage, let me tell you now for free – You are wasting
your time. Holding on to those things, those hurtful words, replaying those
hurtful, ugly scenes in your head, repeating all those negative pronouncements,
facial expressions and side remarks would only hold you back. You can never use
a broken, charred brick to build a house. It will eventually crumble. It is the
exact same way you cannot expect to touch lives or make a difference if your
heart is filled with everything negative- It could be a negative mind set about
yourself which would eventually be transferred to other people, sometimes when
you least expect it to come out. I can’t help but mention this verse from the
Bible in “Proverbs 23:7a – As a man thinks in his heart, so is he.” Whatever
you have in your heart will come out when you are not so guarded and before you
know it, you will begin to believe those words, that opinion that somebody has
about you, that rejection, that hurt would soon become all you know and then
there would be nothing more to give than your hurt! Until you start to love again and
when I say love, I mean it in every sense of it – Love yourself, love people
(no matter how much they have hurt you in the past) and most importantly, love
God, you will never see past your hurt and see the pain that someone else may
be going through and in the process maybe make an impact.
I realised that as much as God loves me, it is not about me
– The sooner I began to see that anything that was not of good report,
anything that had no life and no love, had no place in my
heart, the sooner I started to see the bigger picture. The sooner I started to
see God in everything, the sooner I started seeing myself the way God sees me; not just as a physically beautiful being, but as a mentally and emotionally
beautiful being. When you start to see God as the One you owe everything to,
when you start to see people through His eyes, when your heart starts to ache
for the same things that He longs for, then my friend – You are beginning to
walk in purpose!
Never let anyone bring you down with their negative words
and dispositions. That is all they know and sadly that is all they can give.
Life has a way of rubbing people the wrong way and reshaping them into who they
were never meant to be, but your simple act of love could just be the only tool
God needs to redirect that life back to how it was originally created to be!
Start walking in purpose - somebody needs you!
Until next time
Hadassah xx
